Finest beard in the game

Two days into the match and I'm terribly bored by it. Graeme Smith, you clout, you should have put India in to bat, if only for our entertainment. Instead, we had to watch Zaheer Khan give us false hope by picking up the two early wickets of Graeme "shovel-to-the-legside" Smith and Ashwell "walking-wicket" Prince.

But the way this match is positioned is similar to the first test match at Chennai when South Africa toured India two years ago. A big Hashim Amla hundred, terrible bowling by Harbhajan, and a big first-innings score.

Those of you who know what happened after that, good on you, treat yourself to a cookie.

Those who don't, I'll tell you, but hell awaits if you touch that cookie jar.

India took a lead of close to a hundred runs, and Sehwag scored the quickest triple century ever. Who was in the bowling attack? Steyn, Morne Morkel, Makhaya Ntini and Paul Harris.

True, India had Dravid and Laxman, but there was no Gambhir then. Murali Vijay played well against Brett Lee and Mitchell Johnson on debut, pace doesn't bother him. And Badrinath is the best domestic batsman to make his debut in the middle order since Dravid and Ganguly 14 years ago, he should fit into the role.

And it's a flat pitch.

This match is surely heading for a draw, as despite the turn on offer, Harbhajan and Mishra don't look up to the task. If this series is to have a result, the next match should either be on a green top and let South Africa win, or a dustbowl coupled with Pragyan Ojha getting a game.

Day 3 begins today, and that's where the match should be taking off.

Here we go

It's about five minutes until the match begins, and the news is already bad for India.

Laxman is out.

And it gets worse.

Rohit Sharma, his designated replacement, injured himself this morning.

And it gets worse.

His replacement is Wriddhiman Saha.

You can scream now.

This is a case of selector stupidity again - Dinesh Karthik dropped for Saha. Karthik went on to make two absurdly brilliant 150+ scores, taking South Zone near to a Duleep Final Trophy almost single-handedly. His experience and class would certainly have come in handy right now. I've seen Saha bat - he's talented, but to throw him in against Steyn, Morkel and Parnell, can't be good.

I can only hope he proves me wrong.

Murali Vijay has so far shown that he belongs in this team, and Badrinath is finally getting his chance after years of domestic excellence. He's a long term prospect and a good performance from him is crucial.

Right, the match has begun.

Australia sweep Pakistan - metaphorically

As I watched the final over of the T20 between Australia and Pakistan, the equation was 8 needed from 3 for Pakistan with one wicket remaining, and one of the commentators said,

"Good teams find a way to win."

Obviously, that was about Australia - and my mind immediately conjured up the corollary: bad teams find a way to lose.

Now obviously, Pakistan has good players - immensely talented, as Kamran Akmal displayed while batting and Umar Gul while bowling.

But that doesn't make them a good team.

This may be a cricket cliche, but they did snatch defeat from the jaws of victory. Not that I want to take anything away from the way the Aussies bowled and fielded - they were simply amazing.

Shaun Tait made a fiery comeback, picking up three wickets while making the batsmen hop, clocking 160 kmph in the process. Dirk Nannes and Mitchell Johnson were 150 + too, and Johnson recovered especially well after conceding 20 in his first over - his next three overs went for only three runs!

Newbie Steve Smith held his nerve to pick up wickets at key moments, not getting intimidated by the batsmen going after him.

There were three maiden overs by Australia. In a T20. That's probably unprecedented, and disappointing from Pakistan. But then how much confidence can they be expected to have, losing every match on this tour.

Oh, and Afridi bit a ball.

Hahahahaha.

I'll leave you with this, and this is not in any way related to what I think the Pakistan cricket team does at bedtime.

Indian selectors get drunk together, make some call-ups, regret it in the morning

So the squad for the first test against South Africa has been picked, and it goes like this:

MS Dhoni (capt/wk), Virender Sehwag, Gautam Gambhir, S Badrinath, Sachin Tendulkar, VVS Laxman, Harbhajan Singh, Zaheer Khan, Amit Mishra, Pragyan Ojha, Ishant Sharma, M Vijay, Sudeep Tyagi, Abhimanyu Mithun, Wriddhiman Saha.

No Dravid, no Yuvraj, no Sreesanth - due to injury.

If the newbies were picked on the basis of form, I don't know what Badrinath is doing in the squad. Yes, his record is great, but Mohammed Kaif has scored a double century and a century in one week in domestic cricket and has experience at the Test level, Abhishek Nayar has been amazingly consistent and I've no idea why Cheteshwar Pujara continues to be overlooked.

This is probably not even an important selection but Saha? Really? What has Karthik done wrong?

The fast bowling cupboard suddenly looks bare again... Zaheer and Ishant are far ahead of everyone and seem to have cemented their places, but a while ago there was Irfan Pathan, RP Singh and Munaf Patel to fill in for an injured player. Now there's Tyagi, who seems a good prospect, and Mithun, who is a pretty good quick but it's only his debut season in first class cricket. Hasn't even played the IPL yet (yep, that's what we measure experience by these days).

Plenty of batting in the wings - Rohit Sharma can't suddenly be trusted to bat responsibly because of one triple century and Rahane, Mukund, Pandey and Dhawan have their days ahead of them.

The line-up for the first test is likely to be:

Sehwag, Gambhir, Vijay, Tendulkar, Laxman, Badrinath, Dhoni, Harbhajan, Zaheer, Ishant, Ojha.

Which doesn't look all bad. Except for the gaping Dravid-sized hole. Well, he doesn't have many years ahead of him - might as well face it early, right?

Right?

IPL 3 - Transfers - You read it here!

Right, so the auction has just got over, and here I am, at night, bringing you my immediate and (maybe) unbiased opinion.

Mumbai Indians : Kieron Pollard and Harshal Patel - Mumbai decided to use all their purchasing power on the hard-hitting Trinidadian Kieron Pollard, presumably based on his heavy displays at the Twenty20 Champions League. This doesn't seem to be the best choice for me - I'd have preferred a batsman with other gears than 'super-accelerate' - like Eoin Morgan, for example. I would get rid of Sanath and use Napier and MacLaren more... they are all-rounders, and from what Nita Ambani said, they wanted a 'batting allrounder' (Patel's one too). Makes no sense at all to me. But as a supporter, gotta stay positive.

KKR : Shane Bond - Of course Shahrukh Khan would want a tearaway fast bowler. Whose name is also Bond. Haaah. This can be a very good buy though, subject to Bond's fitness. And how's that turned out in the past, eh? Don't we all want KKR to fail...

Deccan Chargers : Kemar Roach and Harmeet Singh - A pace attack already consisting RP Singh and Fidel Edwards, now with Kemar Roach... this can only strengthen the current IPL champs. And now they have two guys named Harmeet Singh - I bet Gilly will get a kick just outta playing both.

Delhi Daredevils : Wayne Parnell - And another great left-arm quick for Delhi, after Ashish Nehra and Dirk Nannes... They're all great but I think the attack will have a same-ish feel to it.

BRC : Eoin Morgan and Ashok Meenaria - Eoin Morgan is a great addition to any side for his ability to improvise and change games suddenly, and in pressure situations too. In Meenaria, Bangalore attain another U-19 captain after Virat Kohli.

Kings XI Punjab : Adrian Barath, Mohammed Kaif and Yusuf Abdulla - Like many prefer to do, Punjab have often opened with a joke. No offense, Sunny Sohal / Karan Goel, but you're no Adrian Barath. Mohammed Kaif is a really interesting buy at 250,000. I hear several shouts of 'really?' and 'why the...' and 'whaaaaat?' - most of that is me - and I really can't understand this one. 'Really?' Yusuf Abdulla, hmm, was the the IPL's highest wicket taker last season up till a certain point where he was suddenly dropped to make way for shinier toy Brett Lee. Which actually makes sense.

Chennai Super Kings : Thissara Perera and Justin Kemp - A smart couple of buys there for Chennai, roping in two explosive all-rounders. Kemp is a big, renowned smasher, and Perera recently displayed his talent against India. Both are handy medium-pacers.

And lastly, because I hate them,

Rajasthan Royals : Damien Martyn and Adam Voges - Warney just keeps bringing his Aussie mates in... if first Lehmann, Watto and Quiney, now these two - I didn't even know Martyn was still playing! Knowing Shane Warne though, he'll probably get the best out of these guys. But they're still going down. Damn, I wish there was another division so they'd just get relegated!

Right, that's my expert opinion. Rishabh's believe it or not.

4.15 am and time to sleep.

Riiiight

This is my first non-cricket post in a while... so I may be a bit rusty, though my 'rusty' could be probably be a pretty good standard for many! (don't take that as a braggy statement, though it may be one)

My education and I have now relocated to Canada's York University, where I am now residing. My days alternate between no free time and too much of it. As you may have guessed, today's a case of the latter - always a good time to blog.

The last couple of months in Dubai were pretty busy for me, compiling several stuff needed for my transfer... all I knew of York was from the website and endless paperwork. When I actually came here for the first time and saw the first banner with the logo on it, it suddenly came real - this was the place I'd call home for the next four to five months and in the long run, about two and a half years at a minimum.

And the cold. And the snow. Temperatures that were the same in Dubai at the time, though with a negative sign in front of it. From going in to escape the heat, I went to going in to escape the cold. The snow's still cool (no pun intended) though, don't mind that one bit.

It's all new, and it's all fun.

Now, enough of the awestruckness.

I've been watching some Saturday Night Live, and you gotta love the entire talented cast - they all turn in hilarious, memorable performances almost every episode. Fred Armisen, Will Forte, Bill Hader, Kristen Wiig, Abby Elliot, Kenan Thompson, Jason Sudeikis, Bobby Moynahan and especially Andy Samberg for the hilarious 'I threw it on the ground'.



Gotta go.

Kohli steps up

India's T20 World Cup victory in 2007 may have slightly overshadowed another important happening: The U-19 World Cup win.

Virat Kohli, the captain, leading from the front, the tournament featuring a century in 60-odd balls against the West Indies. Earmarked for greatness, seemingly, as proved my math teacher at the time who said Kohli was a 'future captain.'

Good domestic performances allowed selectors to draft him into the senior squad, if only to get some experience on tour. Matches were limited, but he didn't fail. What we saw of him in those few matches and in the IPL was flashy and aggressive, typical of the young T20 generation.

Opportunity arose through Yuvraj Singh's injury, Sachin Tendulkar's rest and Rohit Sharma's slipping down the pecking order, and Kohli was promoted up the order to showcase what he's capable of.

The century against Sri Lanka under pressure in the final match showed he has class and an array of strokes, and that he isn't some lucky cow-corner-slogger.

Another 91 against Bangladesh, under pressure again, and he's beginning to be the solid young batsman India need in the middle order, as Suresh Raina is still weak against the short ball.

If he can keep up his performances and cement a place (only one is really available when Sachin retires), leadership would definitely be the next step.

That's all far away though.

End of a decade

Hola!

A very happy new year from the Adventures of Billy the Worm!
2010 and the coming decade should definitely be awesome!

A once in a decade post will follow when I feel like it...

Ravindra Jadeja wins a match for India

Yeah, he did. His first ever match-winning contribution for India, at least one that people can remember.

And what a time to bowl his best stuff, after the Lankans had been rollicking at 165/1, largely thanks to Tillekeratne 'Dilscooper' Dilshan, Upul 'No-real-nickname' Tharanga, and Sanga (because it rhymes).

Harbhajan decided to bowl well on a turning track and Jadeja pulled out a can of whoop-ass.

My image of him has changed. A bit.

I always thought of him as a limited-over specialist spinner, the Johan Botha type who fires it in around off stump, and who can slam the ball a bit.

Now he's a pretty decent all-rounder.

A few months ago we all hated his guts for his really slow innings in a T20. We all wanted him to be dropped.

Now he's a decent all-rounder who deserves his place instead of Yusuf Pathan.

I'm an Indian cricket fan, though. My opinion could only be as constant as the next match.

Mendis got served today, by the way. Remember my post?

Sehwag paints the field red

I missed out today. Woke up late, thought of checking the score, but decided against it and settled down with a bit of breakfast.

Then I checked my RSS feeds of various websites in search of something interesting to read, and saw this under Cricinfo:

'Sehwag and Vijay pulverise Sri Lanka'. Of course, this would later become 'Virender Sehwag pulverises Sri Lanka'. Rightly so, as no other batsman in this match should even be in the same frame. The Sehwag should get an entire channel to himself.

Anyway, that headline sent me into super-click mode, leading me to the live scorecard, and I ran to catch it live.

Dilshan has become more successful after being said to have gone the 'Sehwag way', which is all crap. Only Sehwag goes the Sehwag way. Dilshan made a quick hundred and got out. What you get with Sehwag is a man who smashes his way past hundred and tries to multiply it by whatever number appears by randomly picking a finger on his hand.

He may be in the company of Brian "I'm-so-angry-my-team's-losing-so-I'll-break-a-record-maaaaan" Lara and Don "My-team's-invincible-and-I-average-a-hundred" Bradman, but he's Virender "I-see-the-ball-and-try-to-hit-it" Sehwag. He batted so well that Vijay's sublime 87 and Dravid's solid 62 seem like nothing more than good starts.

Tomorrow people will be rushing to catch the match right from the morning, in anticipation of whatever Sehwag can cook up. Even if he gets out first ball, he will be the holder of the top three scores by Indians - that is a good enough feat for anyone.

By the way, Muralitharan has taken 5 wickets at 103 this series.

"And I didn't even have to use this!"

Mendis falls off the Mystery Machine

I'm not one to gloat, but India won today. Their 100th Test win. And not just won, won convincingly - against a contender for the number one spot. India's got themselves to a position from which a win in their next test match will propel them to the top of the rankings. Definitely gloatworthy!

But there's another picture... Sri Lanka picked three spinners for this match - Muralitharan, Herath, and Mendis - three spinners of the calibre that England, Australia, South Africa and the West Indies yearn to possess today. India handled them with such ease that they looked like club cricketers who'd struggle to outdo my legspin. Ajantha Mendis, in particular, was given no respect. He was relentlessly attacked by Sehwag and Gambhir - quite enough to demoralize any bowler, even one who had the same team on the mat in his debut series.

So has his magic faded? His mystery been solved? His mojo been stolen by a Fat Scotsman?

Here are the stats (using Cricinfo's Statsguru) of Ajantha Mendis' bowling career:

In his first three matches (all against India), he took 26 wickets at 18.38, and at an economy of 2.92, with a best of 6/117.

In his next three matches, the corresponding stats are 8 wickets, avg 38.25, econ 2.78, best 4-71.

The next three matches, he took 8 wickets again, but at an average of 44, an economy of 2.93 and a best of 3-20.

Then comes the Kanpur test. 2 wickets for 162, average 81, economy of 4.26.

It seems like the teams have figured him out - but keep in mind that he is still only 10 tests old, and has only played India, Pakistan, Bangladesh and New Zealand. He may still do well, if given a chance, against the (other) bigwigs, Australia and South Africa, and definitely against West Indies. With Herath breathing down his neck though (figuratively, I've no idea what goes on in the Lankan camp), Mendis may have limited opportunities. He is certain to be dropped for the third test at Mumbai, since Herath was better at Kanpur and had a mystery ball of his own. He's probably hoping Mumbai will be a dustbowl, which is a possibility if the curator is an ass.

Unless Mendis steps up his game and invents a ball that swings away, breaks in and keeps swirling until it avoids the bat, he'll probably remain on the sidelines. But I'm not complaining - anyone who plays for KKR is subject to some suffering.

Mendis' latest ploy - learning telekinesis

Back with a (not very loud) Bang

Man, long breaks are awesome. Despite feeling audience-less, though, here I am, at it again. Writers are always looking for inspiration, and I guess mine is good cricket. Oh, and a post by Andy Zaltzman deserves some credit for getting me going. The Champions League (t20) is underway, and as I write this Deccan Chargers has become the third of three Indian teams in the tournament to lose their opening match. Anyway, this post isn't about the cricket so I won't display my flair for cricketing guru-ism. Unlike Ravi Shastri and his bunch of overused cliches.

It's been a couple of months since I returned from South Africa, having lived in the wilderness, surviving off wild berries and the occasional wildebeest. Well, almost. I did learn many things from the trip. Like how even after an 8 hour flight with a decent amount of turbulence, people still go "ooh" on a bus when it hits a bump. The driver who picked us up was a friendly local white man named But (with the two dots over the 'u'). Over the course of the two and a half hour drive he spoke of many things, some of which was interesting, while repeatedly informing us that he grew up on a multicultural farm and knew nothing about racism, politics, or political racism. Full of good humour, he cracked jollies such as "impalas are the McDonald's for lions around here", all while driving at 160 kmph on an 80 kmph road, and looking back at us to tell us to watch out for animals on the road. Tad garrulous, that man, though I suspect that's the nature of his job. As we entered an area known to have Black mambas, we asked him if they are as dangerous as is supposed. He morbidly explained that if bitten, we wouldn't suffer much as we'd only have "three minutes left to live." I think he was being funny.

The next day we visited the Palace hotel, the biggest in those parts. In its backyard was a little forest, which featured the widest tree trunk in South Africa. Or atleast, according to our guide. So, after drinks at the pool bar (I hadn't finished my juice so I carried it), we made our way into the forest. As I trekked up the tree-filled area, I feared encountering a baboon. And that it would laugh at the sight of me, fruit cocktail in hand.

Several highlights come to mind when I look at my hastily scribbled notes (can you scribble on a cellphone?), such as the world's politest argument between one of our African (Afrikaan?) drivers and an Indian security guy.
ISG: Sir, will you please remove your van? You can't park there.
AD: I park here everytime.
ISG: Well, you can't now. Please remove it.
AD: You can't make me, sir.
ISG: Sir you have to remove it or I'll call your supervisor.
AD: I'll remove it but this is not cool.
ISG: Ok sir. I'm going to report you.
AD: Ok, fine.
ISG: Haaaah! Owned! Gimme some!
(The last line may have been fiction)

I also got to see Cape Point, the Southernmost point of South Africa. The tip of the continent of Africa, too. It was the one point in my life I knew exactly where I was standing if I looked at a map. Grand feeling, that. I even remember looking at the seaweed coming out of the ocean and thinking, "Hah! That's what fish smoke! Hahahaha!" Have I been lamer?

Another fascinating bit of my trip was my initiation to alcohol. Nothing like the dullness of going to a club and downing a few shots; it was at a wine and cheese tasting. I remember sipping several different wines and feeling the same disgust upon tasting each, and I remember the brilliance of the cheese, segmented into 3, 6, 9 and 12-month old quarters. Never have I liked crackers so much. Apparently I didn't have enough alcohol to get even slightly high. Hmmmm...

So those were the standout parts of my trip, apart from the brilliant food I got to eat wherever I went. Seriously, the class of every coffee shop/cafe and restaurant is awesome. On another note, I never did get to see the 'millions' of Indians that Russell Peters promised were in South Africa. Though I did see famously infamous Bollywood actor Shakti Kapoor, who nonchalantly waved at us while shouting at someone on the phone.

Since I've been back, I've been really busy. Had my ankle sprained and repaired, college has begun (to get boring), and I'm now on the cricket team. Was even briefly in the sports section of the local newspaper, which I count as an achievement, despite the fact that my name is misspelled. TV season has started too, which is another post altogether. All in all, I've had better stuff to do than write for an audience that is very small or non-existent.

Right, I'm out of stuff to say.